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This is how The St. Valentine's Day Massacre works:
 We'll send you the giant 11x15 136-page 2023 Rand McNally Road Atlas
and the St. Valentine's Day Massacre book of instructions. (Entries will be fulfilled
as soon as we receive your registration, up until St. Valentine's Day.)
You'll start at the Statue of Liberty and travel (vicariously, by map) across the continent to the Golden Gate Bridge.
Entries are accepted continuously until St. Valentine's Day, February 14. (The completion deadline for everyone is March 6.)
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Scroll to the bottom for all entry
information.
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What has Jeopardy! champion Ken Jennings written about the St. Valentine's Day Massacre? Click:
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By following the Massacre's auto rally kind of instructions, at your kitchen table or wherever you want, an hour or two at a time whenever you want,
we travel on a continuous course over mountains and plains, from page to page in the atlas, from the Statue of Liberty to the Golden Gate Bridge.
2023 is going to be a harmonious year: we'll drive westbound from New York City, visiting Harmony in Pennsylvania, Beauty in Kentucky, Paradise in Michigan,
Success in Missouri, Valentine in Nebraska, Happys Inn in Montana, and Carefree in Arizona, on our
way across the continent.
2022 was a colorful year as we headed eastbound, visiting Blue Jay in California, Greenleaf in Idaho, Red Lodge in Montana,
Vermillion in South Dakota, Blue Mound in Illinois, Yellow Pine in Alabama, and Orange in Virginia.
2021 was declared the International Year of Fruits and Vegetables by the United Nations, and we celebrated by visiting Cucumber
[West Virginia], Spuds [Florida], Beanblossom [Indiana], Cherry [Minnesota], Tomato [Arkansas], Corn [Oklahoma], and Strawberry [Arizona].
For 2020 we *saw the C sights* across the continent, from the Cascades to Cody, Clay County, Cape Girardeau,
Cash, and Carrying Place [Ontario] to the big City.
In 2019 we saluted Ernies, such as 16-tonner
Tennessee Ernie Ford and over-the-top comedian Ernie Kovacs, both of whom were born exactly 100 years earlier.
We celebrated by visiting Ernie’s Restaurants in Virginia, South Carolina, Missouri, and California. And Burning Man in Nevada!
In 2018 we honored classic American writers, in their namesake places: Hawthorne, California; Thoreau, New Mexico; Whitman, Nebraska; Dickinson, North Dakota; Wilder, Minnesota; Irving, Illinois; Fitzgerald, Georgia; and Wharton, New Jersey.
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Along the way, we'll ask you questions to see if you are on the correct course. Here's the very first question on the 2022 event, and part of the instructions it's between.
1. ... whereupon Ranger Ophelia tosses her duffel into the Franklin’s back seat and hops in and you go south ...
Question: Which of these do you see?
Half Moon Bay Arpt.
San Francisco Int’l Airport
2. Go left on California 92 in San Mateo Co.
As it happens, #1 placed us on southbound California 1, which we stayed on through Presidio of San Francisco and down the
Pacific coast past Half Moon Bay Arpt. to California 92 for Instruction #2.
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Google Street View for 2023 St. Valentine's Day Massacre
Bonus: Occasionally during the rally we provide a link to a Google Street View photo taken along the course.
These photos don’t affect the Massacre instructions or questions in any way and may safely be ignored if you aren’t interested in them.
But click on any of these if you are interested in seeing what's 'really' there [and after clicking on an image you can rotate the picture to look around,
and travel up or down the road, as with any Google Street View photo].
As for us, we weren’t watching the road; we were enjoying the scenery, especially the trees and clouds.
in Leg 1:
White Mills, Pennsylvania
Estella
Knapp
entering New York
Cherrytree, Pennsylvania
in Leg 2:
Interstate 80 in Ohio
Ohio 82
Roswell
Senecaville
Carlisle
Yellowbud
Newfoundland, Kentucky
in Leg 3:
Sitka, Kentucky
Harmony, Ohio
Ohio 235 & Ohio 309
Millville, Michigan
Flat River
Manistee River
in Leg 4:
Sigourney, Iowa
Success, Missouri
in Leg 5:
Classic Car Collection in Nebraska
Elkhorn River
in Leg 6:
Mud Butte, South Dakota
leaving United States
leaving Canada
Vida, Montana
Happys Inn
in Leg 7:
Moyie Springs, Idaho
Capitol of Utah
Big Water
Kykotsmovi Village, Arizona
Arizona 87
in Leg 8:
Carefree Highway
Nevada 379
entering California
Morgan Territory Rd.
Foothill Blvd.
interchange 442 rest area
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To sign up for this winter's 2023 St. Valentine's Day Massacre, send a check (payable to 'Massacre') for the entry fee to: St. Valentine's Day Massacre, P.O. Box 53, La Cañada, California 91012.
The entry deadline is St. Valentine's Day. The completion deadline is March 6.
The entry fee is $69 for U.S. addresses.
If in Canadian dollars, it's $99. For the U.K.: £59. For other overseas: $79 U.S.
St. Valentine's Day Massacre
P.O. Box 53
La Cañada, California 91012
- - and we'll be glad to enclose a gift announcement for you
if you'd like to send a friend cross-country as a gift
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